today

Today, just like the day before, and the day before that (and, as you could truthfully say, so on) I asked myself for the hundredth time... How did I arrive in this dark situation?
I am contemplating suicide. I am. I seriously am. I think of how to best facilitate it. What have I got to live for? Easy life? Drinks by the pool? Hot chics and sports cars? Alright... alright hold on... You've convinced me! Yes! YES, GODDAMNIT! That really is something to live for. Alright... Soo no suicide then, huh?
Good.
Good good.
Very good.
Now I have something to live for.
See? There is something constructive.
Now... the only question I now ask myself is HOW.
How will I facilitate that?

Well... I needed to become rich.
So I made my own corporation. It hasn't started generating income yet. But it was a start. Yesterday we had our first corporate party at a night club. Yes, we had no income. We had no clients. But we could throw parties. And maybe that's all that matters because ultimately the whole life is nothing but perceptions. Trick is not to fall for them. The goal had to be achievable. And I wasn't sure my goal was.

What makes a good manager

Today I failed as a manager. Me and my colleagues were doing a huge huge project and in my ambitions to get a head start of everyone (as managers need to be ahead of everyone else by at least one step) I zoned out and failed to hear a couple of remarks made at me while I was coding away. Of course I heard them after and I took immediate action but there was an unpleasant moment during which I was unresponsive and the person talking to me felt like he was talking to a wall. Not what a good manager should do. So let me state here the top characteristics that in my opinion define a good manager

• You must NEVER EVER EVER waste people's time; a meeting must be short with an agenda and maximum benefit must be extracted from the meeting at all costs


• You are always ahead of the team, knowing exactly what needs to be done and, more importantly, knowing the team members


• The team doesn't see you as THE SCARY MANAGER but you are all equal; you must sometimes sit behind the scenes so that other team members who are ambitious may experience leadership themselves


• You must divide the work evenly between the team members and yourself, including your management. I see a lot of managers sitting late at night typing emails and I think to myself, man, I don't wanna be one of those guys

And every day I am a manager I fail to do these things. Lesson learned or lesson not learned I will take my time in becoming the best manager that I can be. Let me tell you what the best part of being a manager is. It is that moment when you come to a mutual understanding, when everyone starts to work equally as hard with an equal amount of enthusiasm and you have a business, NOT a contest to stay awake the longest.